I haven't worked on my business (or well, anything, really) in over two months.
(Content warning: Light mention of grief and death of a loved one.)
Okay, scratch that.
I have worked on my business. A lot.
And I’ve also beaten myself up a lot over it: over the decisions I still need to make, the people I need to reach out to, the follow through, the long term plan.
When I start to get really hard on myself, it’s usually time to take a closer look at what’s REALLY happening, that I’m trying to fit into the struggles of building a business.
(This thought process turned into a zine titled, "What Did I Miss?" Go check it out below!)
It always feels a little "captain obvious" when I share that I've been having mental health struggles lately because literally WHO HASN'T... but I've been told by good friends and mentors that this is something we need to talk about more openly. And several of you have told me directly that you appreciate my "real" approach.
So, here we are!
As a recap introduction:
At the beginning of 2025 I lost my little brother. He was autistic and deveopmentally disabled and as one of his caregivers, he was my life partner, brother, and kid all at the same time.
It’s taken a lot of work to grieve that loss over the last year, and the process is (of course) ongoing.
Fast forward to now, after a LOT of pivots, therapy, medication, and just giving myself time, things are different! I’m building a character design and illustration business (and just closed off my third project!) I’ve got new, budding circles of friends both online and IRL. Dungeons and Dragons changed my life. That kind of stuff.
The last few weeks have been really hard, and I struggled with getting my brain to believe that things were possible. So the newsletter took a back seat while I went through my list of things I missed when it comes to keeping myself feeling like a decently living human being.
Juggling lots of feelings and projects and all of them are in my head.
So I made a zine about it! Introducing: What Did I Miss? A List of Things I Remember When I Want to Feel Better
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Zine Text:
This is a list of things I try to remember when my brain forgets how to let me live like a decent, loved, or at least just stable human being.
Do I Like Myself?
Like for real, girl. How's your self esteem. How do I honestly feel about myself when I don't have external validation, and when I'm not conveniently distracted and overworked so I have no time or fuel to know how I really feel?
Am I Eating?
When my brother died, I lost my appetite and stopped noticing most of my hunger symptoms. Now I get sad if I'm hungry. So if I'm sad, I check the last time I ate, and I gotta tell ya... a LOT of the time I'm actually hungry and not sad.
When's The Last Time I Saw People?
It took me until my late 30s and nearly 40s to learn that I need social time despite being a major introvert. If it's been a while, I sit down and text the best people in my life and make plans, and that act of planning usually helps me feel better.
Have I Exercised?
As much as possible, I try not to make exercise equate to, "How do I feel about how I look?" Luckily, with age, I've found some maturity and understanding around my personal "fat girl" stigma, along wtih the handy knowledge that YOU KNOW WHAT? I actually feel good when I exercise regularly. It has nothing to do with numbers and appearance. Just feeling strong and proud of myself. So I check in on whether I feel proud of what I've physically done.
Are My Meds Still Working?
Medication for mental health is not cheating. It is self care and smart and necessary for some of us. If someone has severe asthma, I would never expect their goal to be to find a way to not need their asthma medication anymore. TAKE THE DAMN MEDS IF YOU NEED MEDS! And you know what? Bodies change. And so do bodies' needs for medication. So I occasionally have to have an honest check in with myself about whether it's time to switch things up and ask for something higher or different.
What Story Can I Get Lost In?
With my affinity for D&D, video games, fantasy novels, and movies, this one is hard to not turn to IMMEDIATELY before all the rest.
But if I know that I really have been doing "all the things" and I'm just having a crappy moment/day/week, then it's probably time to just let the moment be a sad one.
Just feel the feelings, Rochelle.
And after that, take some self care time in my favorite alternate universes with imaginary people. Where I don't have to think about consequences, outcomes, checking in on people, eating enough fiber, maintaining relationships, and all that.
I remember to go play, and lose myself in what brings me joy.
[from Artist & Writer Rochelle Sanchez]
Thoughtful reminders emailed twice a month (on the 5th and 20th) about running your business in a way that actually fits your life. Plus behind-the-scenes stories, art drops, and the occasional rant, because have you SEEN the state of the world right now? Yeah, you get it.